Hello and welcome,
Over this past week our class has been learning about early humans. In peculiar fashion the following question popped up, “What would it be like if you were not a homosapien sapien and were instead perhaps an Australopithecus?” I think I would like to tell you why it might be fun to be an Australopithecus.
First of all, Australopithecus can climb trees. I mean they were really good at climbing trees, perhaps better even than Koala bears. This ability is a great survival skill. If you are off the ground you are out of reach from predators like big cats and giant ground snakes. Another good thing about climbing trees is that your dinner, lunch and breakfast are all likely to be right where you are hanging around. Climbing a fruit or nut bearing tree means that you are likely to never go hungry. Being in a tree also gives you the advantage of being able to spot things from far away. From a distance you can decide if things are good or bad before they are a problem to you. Given the number of birds who make trees their homes I think it is safe to say that branches and leaves make great nests, and what can be more cozy or warm than a nest in a tree. It is quite possible that the original rock a bye baby song actually comes from this time as mother would rock their babies to sleep in nests, the only danger would be to have the wind come up and make the nest fall. Sticks would be handy for making tools too, if any Australopithecus had been smart enough to make tools: which they were not. On this point we can also observe that there are no holes in trees, which is an advantage if you are not smart enough to figure how to get out of a hole once you have fallen in. Holes were a problem worth solving for Australopithecus.
If you cannot be smart you might as well be safe and good looking. Australopithecus had a flat nose similar to Voldemort in Harry Potter. It was very attractive and went well with the fact that they really had no chins and their foreheads sloped over their eyes. It is certainly a look that seems to be coming back if you look at all of those selfies out there with their chins pulled back into their necks and their squinty little eyes. Having a sloped forehead would be helpful I guess if you are making your way through the branches of a tree and trying not to bump your head. It would also be a big disadvantage if you fell into a hole because you could not easily see how to get out without craning your neck. To finish off the look they had very furry feet. This has become very popular since the Lord of the Rings movies came out and introduced us to Hobbits. It is also pretty useful when you really like warm socks. For Australopithecus, your wool socks are attached. Come to think of it, Australopithecus would also have come with a built in sweater and wool pants: cozy.
There’s also evidence that they lived in Australia. In my opinion this is one of the greatest reasons for wanting to be an Australopithecus. You could hang out in a tree and have an argument with a koala bear, or hang out over a river and tease a crocodile. Pretty cool given the fact that you could do both with that wicked Australian accent. It is also a lot better than living on the plains in Africa and having an argument with a lion or a cheetah. At least with a koala you get to wrestle with something cute and fuzzy. When you try to pick and argument with a lion or a cheetah you will likely end up as breakfast before you finish your first sentence.
In conclusion, being an Australopithecus would be pretty desirable given that you can hang out in trees all day, look great and cuddle with adorable koala bears.
Sincerely Talia